April 16, 2004
I really don't know where to begin. I guess I'll start at the top.
I am 21, have 3 children, and had been in either mentally abusive relationships, or physically abusive relationships.
No matter what, I never believed in abortion (it was murder).
I had recently started back in college and had been in for two years at this point. Doing good!
Then I met Mr. Right. He was my world. Everything was out of the story books, until I got pregnant almost a year into the relationship.
He became distant and cruel.
What was I supposed to do? I was turning 5 months [pregnant], and didn't want a 4th child. Not alone, I didn't.
So, I got a second trimester abortion. He was full grown. I know, because right before the abortion, as I sat waiting on the doctor, there was an ultrasound machine in the room.
I looked at him [during the ultrasound], he was turning and moving with a strong heart beat.
I killed him anyway. I have suffered everyday over taking that precious child's life. I hate myself inside.
I asked the nurse what will they do with him. She stated, “Incineration.”
I live with that comment everyday.
I murdered him and then they burnt him…
* Not her real name
